Joy Phenix's Blog

Parenting is a humbling experience. Pardon my surprise, but I didn’t realize how much I needed to change grow to do this job well.  I figured since I had my kids “later” in life, I had a better handle on my emotions and better control of my tongue…which would make parenting much easier.  How hard [...]

Recently, I wrote a post advocating that you have to be hyper-vigilant to close the gaps in your marriage or any relationship that you wish to keep healthy. I followed up with a few practical tips to help keep the gaps from forming in the first place. One of those tips was to intentionally find [...]

“It isn’t that they can’t see the solution.  It is that they can’t see the problem.”  — G.K. Chesterton My seven-year-old has a epic set of cowlicks on top of his head.  He wakes up most mornings with a “bed head” that’s awesomely photo worthy. Taming his mane takes a good bit of water and [...]

Gaps are cute in a kid’s smile, but they don’t look so great when you’ve moved past the playground stage of life. In a similar way, if you’re new to a relationship, you can expect to have gaps in what you know about each other because you are learning how to navigate tough conversations and [...]

Boy, was I fired up! Have you ever been so angry that you know that it would be EXTREMELY unwise to express your thoughts until you cooled down to a mere boiling point? Oh.  I see.  Well, it might just be me, then. But since it’s my story, here’s how it played out. The details [...]

Last week my husband sent me a text message with this photo attached and these four, simple, upending words: “And so it begins.” Apparently, in this picture, my 9-year-old had been on an afternoon phone call for twenty minutes talking to one of her third grade classmates. They covered the topics typical for any preteen [...]

My mother, Gail,  used to teach High School English. That should explain a lot about me. Gail was also the editor of her school newspaper and my dad’s Master’s Thesis.  When she was a counselor at a high school that went through an arduous accreditation process, my mom was the one who had to edit [...]

I try not to get into the habit of telling my kids they’re smart. Don’t get me wrong.   This habit doesn’t mean that I think they have low intelligence; quite the opposite is true.  However, if they bring home a great grade or happen to grasp a concept easily, the last thing I want [...]

If I created a video version of Google maps, I’d use this lovely Jamaican girl to tell everyone their directions. Of course, few people would ever get where they’d want to go, but everyone would fall in love with this cutie like I did.  It makes me want to go visit her at “er ‘ouse [...]

I have a good friend who loves to finish my sentences. My pauses are just too long for her to take.  I tease her mercilessly about the habit, and, for fun, stop whatever I’m saying whenever she interjects.  When she’s guessed wrong, I pause to say… “No – good guess.  Do you want to try [...]